No idea how many times I’ve blogged about friendship since I started blogging in 2006. More than a dozen times probably.
I used to be an extrovert. As I grew up, I start to change… I lose some friends, I gain some, I put in effort to make some work out properly. Recently, one of my friends asked me about my friendship with someone whose behaviour or attitude I cant stand sometimes. Thing is, I’m tired of losing friends. So I’d rather leave things as it is status quo. If that person can change, they would have done it ages ago. So you just have to accept how they are, if you want them to stay in your life.
Just like how relationships work out, friendships need acceptance and forgiveness. One of my ex boyfriends once had this quote that “sometimes what we need most in life is forgiveness”. There may be hurtful moments in a friendship, and yes it may be hard to forgive and forget. Ask yourself if you are willing to put the past behind and start afresh. This means that you withhold the grudges that you previously had with them and start off on a clean slate again. That’s how you work to keep the friendship going isn’t it?
Of course there comes a time when you get sick of the friendship that people take for granted, thinking that they can just approach you when they need or want something from you. & such people come and go, not once, not twice in fact they may come and go as and when they like, for multiple times. Is this friendship worth keeping? Scary to know that there are so many people out there these days that have hidden agendas/motives behind their actions. What’s the best way to deal with them? Confront them about it? Or ignore them when they come talking to you?
I’ll be approaching my early mid-20s in a few months. As of now, I can count the no. of good friends I have with the fingers on both palms. & I’m contented with having just this few. Years ago, I used to have lots of good friends but I couldnt keep them. So I thought that the lesser close ones I have, the easier it would be to maintain friendships. Yeah, when you reach a certain age its no longer about expanding your social network of close friends, but building a stronger bond with the ones that truly matter to you. I’m not saying I’m limiting my social circle but rather, who are the ones that will stick with you for life. You dont have to pretend to be someone else when you are around them, you get to do fun things together. Something common between me and my really good friends are the spontaneous moments that we share. Watch movies, eat happy food, exercise, talk positively ^^ & I’m really blessed to have them all these years, especially those I’ve known for a decade. ❤
Well to conclude this post, all I can say is to be the kind of friend that you want others to be. but of course without having the expectations that they should treat you like how you have treated them. You have to love them and cherish them. If they dont treasure you then you probably dont mean that much to them. Then you’ll know its time to let go of this friendship and focus on other friends who matter more.