Review of year 2014.

The Chinese believe that if you are born in the same year as the Chinese zodiac for the year, you would have 犯太岁 (fan tai sui), and have a bad year due to a zodiac clash. 2014 is the year of the horse, and because my birthday falls before Chinese New Year on the year I was born, I’m considered to be a Horse baby instead of a Goat baby. But I’m not really superstitious about zodiac clashes so I was not aware about this thing till a friend of mine raised it up.

Anyway the main highlights of the year:
1) Finally obtained my driving license, a day before Valentine’s Day.
2) Travelled to at least 3 countries this year– Goldcoast, Bangkok and Malaysia. I love Australia so much that I would not mind going back there again year after year! 😀 Planning to travel more often next year if possible
3) Started cooking more often this year
4) Developed a new found love for cafe hopping
5) Left my job of 3 years at my alma mater as an educator for a career switch in a totally different area.
6) Completed my university studies, with stellar results for my final semester
7) Got shortlisted for a scholarship opportunity
8) Managed to fulfill all my 2014 resolutions for this year (: [refer to previous post before this for more information)

Still working on the resolutions for 2015. Till then, this marks the closure to year 2014. Let’s hope for a better life in 2015. Auld Lang Syne my dear readers. Thank you for being a part of 2014 (:

<3, Jules


Thoughts of the (previous) day…

Its 1.51 am. A myriad of thoughts cross my mind. Yes, of all timing when one should be in deep slumber by now. Managed to meet up with 5 friends on the last weekend of 2014. The time spent may be as short as a couple of hours but all that matters is the company you’re with (:

I’ve made 3 resolutions for 2014 and so proud that I’ve manage to keep them!

1) Join at least 2 runs this year.
Completed 2 x 10KM marathons, and joined 3 fun runs such as Electric Run, Hello Kitty Run & Illumi run

2) Develop a stronger quality of friendship with the people around me.
Done that too! My focus for this year was on maintaining my long-term friendships. I really spent a lot of time with friends whom I’ve known/am close to for > 5 years. To me, a friendship that last is something that withstands the test of time, say 7 years or more? (since there’s a 7-year itch for relationships etc)
This was a challenging year for my best friend & I in particular but we sort of overcame it though we have our own set of imperfections.

3) Grow deeper in my faith and spiritual life.
I think I’ve grown quite a fair bit this year. Joined JFN in church and a discipleship group. Next year would be a whole new step of faith for me as I start serving in Ministry etc (:

Not exactly sure what resolutions to make in 2015 yet. Shall spend the next few days to think about it.
Have you fulfilled all your resolutions for 2014? Fret not, there is still some time left for you to do so. Don’t despair! (:

[p.s. I’ll try to churn out one final post of 2014 on the last day of the year.]

Merry Christmas 2014!

Dear readers,

Here’s wishing you and your loved ones a Merry Christmas! May this be a season of love, joy and peace for you. This is the season to be thankful and contented with what you have. (:

Havent been blogging recently since I’ve been trying to apply for jobs. & recently made a 2D1N weekend getaway with my former work friends. We stuffed ourselves with food constantly. Which reminds me that its time to go running again with the pigging out from the past few days hahaha.

Scholarship interview passed two days ago and I’m not sure if I would get it. Maybe others who are still studying would deserve it more than I do. I’m still carrying a little hope that I would get it because there’s definitely an advantage to being a scholar in terms of opportunities and exposure to the healthcare setting. When I went into the interview room, I was initially nervous at first but relaxed when I saw a familiar face. The interview went on for about 20 minutes which was neither short nor long so it may be a good thing that I managed to tell the interviewers whatever that was on my mind. Thank you those who kept me in your prayers. I really appreciate it! ^^ After the interview, one of the managers contacted her HR staff to arrange for an interview directly with their organisation. If all goes well, I may end up getting a job there before the outcome of the scholarship interview is released in mid Jan.

Had a Christmas eve church service. Thankful that ZX came along for this service. I always find Christmas service meaningful because everyone is gathered together. At least 4X of the usual size of each church service Saw quite a no. of familiar faces as well. It feels good to be able to gather with fellow brothers and sisters to celebrate the heart of Christmas which is the birth of Jesus. After all, what is Christmas without Christ? Managed to distribute some gifts to my cell grp members as well…
& as usual, the food which was catered by Angelis catering was so good! Was quite full after one round that I didnt have space left to eat pasta. D: (oh man now I really sound like a glutton :x)
It was still too early to go home after service so ZX & I went to Star Vista to walk around. & we tried taking selfies with my Instax Mini8 polaroid. without the use of any close up lens with reflective mirror. It was so hilarious! our fingers were obviously not long enough to press the shutter. so I gave ZX my pen and he had to use it to aim at the shutter. After he clicked on it, he burst out laughing from trying to contain his laughter and our pictures turned out ridiculously unglamorous. We tried 2 attempts and the second one was better albeit a picture at an unflattering angle. So please, get someone to take a photo for you unless you are really a pro. hahaha.

Christmas dinner at my grandma’s. My youngest maternal cousin brought his gf over to join us for dinner. This makes me feel so old now & conscious about my own relationship status. lol. Well this probably isn’t my time for a relationship yet. But still it’s good to see the rest of my cousins growing up well. Let’s hope that everyone will be able to find a partner in the recent months ahead =D

Alright, shall end off here for now. Merry Christmas once again! 🙂

A thought about love came to me suddenly. If you are in love with someone & one day you are given the choice to love someone else, you will still choose the same person to love. & your answer would stay the same forever as long as you both shall live.

reflections on relationships

After being in several relationships in my teenage years, this is what I learnt:

I first got into a relationship when I was 18… later than most of my peers who got into 1 during secondary school days. The first relationship was a very short one. & I really hated him back then for damaging my view about love. took me almost 4-5 years before I can say our friendship is restored. but I thank him for giving me up just so he wouldn’t hurt me.

Every relationship teaches you different life lessons. This relationship taught me about long suffering. 

My second relationship was slightly longer but it was short-lived too. this guy promised me the moon and the stars (just an analogy) and made me really happy during those days but he was a cheater. chatting actively with a girl behind my back and I didnt know it till we broke up, that they “got together” the day before the breakup happened. wished I saw the red flags coming when he mentioned her name several times while we were outside.

This relationship taught me that actions speak louder than words else they are simply empty promises.

The third relationship was the longest by far. I’ve mentioned about it a few times in previous posts. This guy was the one that understood me the most, though many at times I really doubted if he did. He didnt even have to say the words “I understand you; I know you too well” blah blah but being together for this long made me realise that this is how a serious relationship should be like. This guy was insecure, jealous easily and somewhat possessive but it made me realise that its because he loved me to the point that my actions could cause him hurt else he wouldn’t have expressed such things out. He made me a part of his clique & family, asking me along for birthday celebrations, gatherings. He wasn’t even afraid to let others know that we were together though we weren’t too high profile about it.

there are times when you feel like giving up but your love for each other makes you stay on. I remembered we talked about breaking up a few times but it didn’t happen till much later. there were disappointments and diff. milestones in our lives that we went through together. Sometimes when I look back, I ask myself why I couldn’t accept the differences in between and whether I really regret being with him for so long. Till now, we’re still on each other’s social media but we seldom contact.

This relationship taught me that sometimes the one you love the most will be the one who disappoint you the most. & even if you love someone, you may not end up being together with them forever. It’s better to let them go, for the grass is greener on the other side. 

The fourth relationship was another short one. I believed that I did love him. Enough to nearly compromise on my own moral values, betray my conscience/go against my beliefs. It took me months to get over the guilt I felt for allowing myself to be in such a risky situation. Then again, this rs might have been a rebound from the previous long-term rs so I’m not sure if we were actually manipulating each other via indirect means.

This relationship taught me that true nature of a person would unfold with time. He wasn’t perfect & neither was I. Don’t give up on what you strongly believe in; nor try to change the other person based on your own personal standards. Love comes with acceptance of their imperfections. Love without expectations that it will be equally reciprocated. 

(this post is one of the most personal posts ever. It was originally drafted in late April but I edited some things before deciding to upload. Please don’t judge nor criticize what I’ve mentioned but you’re free to add on what you’ve learnt about love from your own relationships if you want.)

I think I’m one step closer to finding the right one. I know exactly what I’m looking out for in my potential partner. Have shared with certain close friends of mine about this. Can’t reveal too much about this but generally, a Christ-centered relationship, one that brings intimacy to a whole new level, pray together,  make a commitment, serve together in love. We may make a mental checklist of what we want in our partners but ultimately, I think it’s only by divine intervention that the right person for us would appear in our lives. 🙂

God bless. & thanks for reading. ❤

Paths in life

For the past 6 years of my life, I’ve been questioning myself. Why did I give up on my past relationships? Why am I going into social work when it doesn’t pay as well as other jobs? When I was studying Psychology in polytechnic, there were many times that I wanted to withdraw from the course because I really struggled with research & stats. What piqued my interest was several community services and social work modules. I was motivated with the hope of pursuing an 18-months degree in social work from one of the top universities in Australia via distance learning upon my graduation from polytechnic. Back then it was S$40,000 so I had to save up for it.

One of my polytechnic lecturer encouraged us to pursue a career with the education ministry under the special needs track since we had some background in psychology. I decided to do mainstream education since I was more interest in that area. It was unfortunate that one month into my job, Monash stopped their partnership with the social service institute here. At that time, I asked God “why bring me thus far only to crush my hopes?”. I didnt know what He had in stored for me then. So, I felt like I had no choice left but to take up the social work degree at SIM. During these 3 years, I felt like giving up at certain points with so much going on in my life. Going through heartaches, leaving my job, transiting to a different church, regretting over not choosing to go to a Junior College instead of a polytechnic etc. All these has been a humbling experience for me that tested my morals and it has also certainly shaped me into a better person.

The amazing thing about God’s plan for us is that if we walk in obedience, He will take us further than where we’ve been, and beyond our expectations. That’s if we trust in His sovereignty over our lives. Why we leave certain relationships, take the path of the road less traveled we may not have the exact answer to these “Whys?” but we do know that God will provide a way out for us according to His purposes. God uses His people in ways they may not comprehend. He wants them to trust in His plans and say “Yes, I’m willing.”. It takes a whole lot of courage, to step out from your comfort zone and enter into the unknown. What are the giants in your life that will prevent you from stepping out with faith? Will you surrender everything to Him?

Right now it’s another transitional period of my life after graduating from Uni. To be honest, I’ve been too comfortable in a government job that I’m finding it difficult to set foot in the private sector now. Recently, there’s been several potential job opportunities but I’m afraid that I may lack wisdom to choose the one that best fits me. I’ve got about a month or even lesser to decide where to go. One thing for sure, when God closes one door, another would open for us. I’m so so thankful and grateful for His provision ^^